bynkii (bynkii) wrote,
bynkii
bynkii

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A Perfect Circle meets Mr. Wiggly

Okay, so poorheather and I go to see A Perfect Circle on the 15th. Seems like the thing to do on tax day, right? Go see a prog-rock metal band...



Bartle Hall in KC is a very Manhattan-feeling place. The big problem is the seating. The seats and aisles are so small that if you have big, goofy, long legs like I do, you spend the entire time in something that resembles the fetal position. My left knee was a ball of pain about five minutes in, and numb for the rest of the show. And the accoustics of the place are kinda crappy, so the opening act, (Mars Volta? Fuck all if I know or care, they were kinda lame. Yes, yes, I know, I know, they aren't for everyone. Well, it's not that i'm old, it's that they mostly sucked.), sounded like bass-driven mud. You could barely hear anything beyond the bass player and the singer's incessant screeching.

Okay, just to say this...their drummer ruled. For a really mediocre, gimmic - driven band, this guy was amazing. No flailing, no clubbing. Fast, smooth, powerful, independent...in other words, what John Bonham really was, rather than what everyone thinks Bonham was. Too bad the band is kinda crappy. I mean, each of the individual members of the band were pretty good. Guitar player had skillz and some rhythm. Bass player hid in the back and was quite competent. Keyboards, (when you could hear them) were cool. Even the appendix of a mariachi/conga player was solid. But the singer. Oh.My.God.Stop.Screeching.

Stop

Mariah Carey is going to kick your ass for stealing her schtick. James Brown and Robert Plant are going to be next in line. Yes, there are points where a sustained high note can have power and majesty. When it's every ten seconds, you look like a jackass. The Sideshow Bob hair ain't helping either.

The guitarist trying to do that "sling the guitar around the neck" was really funny since it go caught about halfway 'round, so he looked like he was trying to hang himself with it. Dumbass. At one point the singer picks up a spot and starts swinging it around like a tetherball. I was so hoping he'd forget and slap his hand on the fresnel lens..."ssssss...AAAAAAAAAAH". Bet he'da been screeching then.

it was like this bad aggregation of every stupid metal/prog lamer shit with a sprinkling of James Brown's foot work.

Oh yeah, James is going to kick your ass too. Be standing over you screaming "I'm Rick James Bitch, HAH!"

I do have to say I liked A Perfect Circle. Which was mildly surprising because I thought Tool sucked ass and the Smashing Pumpkins were eh. But this band was pretty cool. "The Outsider" was probably the best song of the set, very powerful, esp. James Iha's guitar work.

Having the mix not sounding like it was underground helped a LOT. Although the singer being in the back, and in the dark was a little odd. But whatever, it's probably more artistic that way. The whole SHITFUCK thing was a scream...the dude really making fun of the Janet Jackson fallout..."Now, when I count to 3, you all scream "shitfuck"...1, 2, 3...SHITFUCK...okay, is anyone dead? Anyone uncontrollably masturbating, humping your leg, clawing at their eyes?....NO" Then at random ponits in the show..."1, 2, 3 SHIT FUCK" So that was kinda funny.

Warning...if James Iha starts playing a really odd version of "I can't explain"..solo...you will see disturbing things...you have been warned.

Other thoughts...

screaming "shitfuck" outside of the show is no longer cool. In fact, it's ONLY cool when the band prompts you for it. Screaming it at random makes you sound like a prog-rock retard with tourette's.

Crowd surfing is dead. Really. Stop it. Although dork #3 getting punched in the ribs as he surfed was really funny.

"I want to fuck the band" woman with a bad tan in a champagne dress, (For all Carol Burnett fans, think "Mrs. Whiggins", or as we called her...TITWOMAN. for one, they were HUGE. I mean, like Porn-starlet-on-her-third-set-of-implants huge. And absolutely fish-belly white...whereas the rest of titwoman was quite tan. Too tan in fact. Very bizarre, but she stood out.

Watching the sad little improv mosh pit. Girl with the pink hair, three elbows to the cranium in thirty seconds is going to ring your bell but good. Take tylenol.

Okay, jackass behind us in baggy jeans...stop playing pocket pool before I drive your dick up into your diapragm.

Ever wonder if an asian man smoking a shitpot of weed still gets (or stays) "chinese - eyed"? Well, i'm here to tell you, i've seen it, they do. Another mystery of life solved.

all in all a fun night.

oh, Alex had a kick ass time at a friends house playing with her twin boys. So a good night for everyone.
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