April 16th, 2007

monk john

If I had an "official" comment policy

It would be this:

Gentle Readers,

Since some of you need some kind of official policy...

Use some common sense. Keep your comments on the topic at hand. Just 'cause you're pissed at me over a previous post, don't be trying to carry it to a new one. That's lame and boring, and while I'm not going to delete anything for OMGSWEARING!!11, I will delete lame and boring like it was never there.

This is not a democracy. I am the sole arbiter of stay or go. This is not a government nor any other kind of entity where free speech laws apply. I think it's too sucky to stay, it goes. Don't like it, don't suck.

Don't tell me how to reply. I don't have to like a comment, I don't have to agree, and if i think you're being a tool when you comment, I'll be less than nice in my reply. Get over it.

I don't mind profanity, but for the love of Dog, don't just spew "fuck" all over. Learn how to use profanity well, or don't bother.

Read the damned site for more than one post, read the comments. That will give you a far better idea of what is acceptable than not. You can harsh on me all you like, just be on topic and entertaining.

Personal threats will be handed to the FBI and the cops, and the sender will be ruthlessly mocked. Unless you're Don Montalvo, in which case, you'll just be mocked. I will also feel free to publish any form of personal information I feel like digging up on you. Note that my friends are IT geeks. You have far less privacy than you think. Don't be a douche, and I'll return the flavor.

Random ad hominem attacks will be returned in kind, and I am capable of being a very mean motherfucker when I want to be, and I don't care if you hate me for it.

In other words, just use your friggin' brain, and it will be all good.

But, since none of you need this, I'm not going to "create" one outside of today's little exercise. Because they're stupid, and an admission that you attract stupid people.

And none of the people who read this site are that stupid as to need one.
monk john

Oh dear lord, it's getting worse.

First we had the F-word

Then the N-word

Then the other F-word

Then a possible second N-word

Now, from CNN and Al Sharpton, we have the latest addition to this joyfully stupid list:

The B-word. That's right folks, you can't say "bitch" anymore. It's now "the b-word".

No, really:
The Rev. Al Sharpton, among the loudest critics calling for Imus' termination, indicated that entertainment is the next battleground. "We will not stop until we make it clear that no one should denigrate women," he said after Imus' firing. "We must deal with the fact that ho and the b-word are words that are wrong from anybody's lips.
I imagine that dog breeders are going to be rather put out that they can't ever say "bitch" again. So will quite a few other people dealing with the wonderful world of Canis lupus familiaris.

But hey, if it keeps Al and Jesse happy, and more importantly, quiet, well, it may not be in fact a bad thing.

Nah, it's still stupid. So stupid in fact, that I shall use song to illustrate how stupid expanding this list of words we fear too much to even speak truly is.

I give you, Kyle's Mom is a Stupid Bitch (in D-Minor), from the true genius of the folks over at Comedy Central and the South Park team:
Well, Kyle's Mom's a bitch, she's a big fat bitch,
she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world,
she's a stupid bitch if there ever was a bitch,
she's a bitch to all the boys and girls.

Monday she's a bitch, on Tuesday she's a bitch,
and Wednesday to Saturday she's a bitch,
then on Sunday just to be different she's a
super King Kamehameha be-atch.

Have you ever met my friend Kyle's Mom,
she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world,
she's a mean old bitch and she has stupid hair,
she's a bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch,

bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch cause-a she's a stupid bitch,
Kyle's Mom's a bitch and she's just a dirty bitch,
Kyle's mom is a bitch-ah.
Can we please knock this shit off before the English language is reduced to nothing but a series of confusing Voldemort references?